Some Feelings From The Past Couple Of Days

" A lot of times I wake up,
Hearing you call my name
A lot of times I end up crying,
Wishing things were the same.
You were the only person in my life,
That understood me.
That made me complete
now I feel like I'm crashing. I feel obsolete. "



I miss you grandpa... every day and every night I think about you. Hopefully you are looking down on me and you are happy.


.... Tanya G

The List

If anything being single has taught me, it has been to always be true to myself. No one should make me change. If I don't want to do something, I don't want to do it. And really who says you have to settle. I don't want to settle, I want to be content. I want to be happy, and to really shine. No more excuses, it's now or never.

I'm starting a list of 100 things I want to do in my life. Hopefully you readers, can join in and make a list for yourselves. I want to succeed in this and I want to follow through. Let's do it.

I'm going to focus on me.

.... Tanya G

I Miss...

Yes I have been moving on from my ex. This break up has hurt me, like never before. I have never ever ever cared or loved a person as much as him. It's really sad and upseting to see how one day he was apart of my life, and the next he was just gone. I miss him, I really do.

I miss his smell after a shower.
I miss the way his hand and mine would always find their way to each other when we went for a walk.
I miss his honesty, his intelligence, his ability to make life simple.
I miss the way that he would just calm me down because he was calm.
I miss the way that he would rub my lower back and put me to sleep.
I miss him strong arms and legs wrapped around me, when we were cuddling.
I miss his excitement whenever he had something new to show me.
I miss the way he would teach me, the things he was most passionate about.
I miss his hugs, because I felt whenever I was in his arms I was safe.
I miss staying up and talking about everything and anything with him.
I miss our little adventures.
I miss High Park. Dundas West. King Slice. Pancakes and Chocolate Milk. Jerk Chicken. Hue's Place. 1017.  October 25.
I miss being called boo boo.
I miss him. Completely. 100%

It wasn't the 'love' part of our relationship. It was the friendship. He was my best friend, and he made me complete. He brought things out in me that no one ever did. And he listened. He tried to understand. And I think, (maybe I hope more then I know) that I brought out things in him. That I was a fit for him. That he loved me. But I'll just carry on in the world, like I don't give a fuck because my heart is broken and to be honest I don't think it will heal back up.

Sorry for this mushy mushy. I don't have anywhere to let out my emotions or feelings. So I'll do it in cyberspace.

So I'll apologize in advance because really I don't care. I don't give a shit about anything. What's the point? I'm already so drained that I don't care anymore. I don't give a fuck. The sad thing is, I don't know how he feels. I don't know if he misses me. I don't know if between everything else he has on his plate if he thinks of me.

Goodnight.

.... Tanya G

What's Important??

ME.

Just reminding myself.

..... Tanya G

Love....

"Women wish to be loved without a why or a wherefore; not because they are pretty, or good, or well-bred, or graceful, or intelligent, but because they are themselves." -- Henri Frederic Amiel